Why Me?
Why Me?
That’s a question usually asked by someone who has had something bad happen. I’m asking that question today because of all the good things that have happened to me.
Two people who have had a profound positive influence on my life are suffering from cancer. I’m 20 years older than one and 6 months older than the other.
Both of these men have helped thousands of people in the world lead happier, fuller, and more purposeful lives. They have made an impact in the world that will outlive them.
I’m 80 and never had a sick day in my life. No surgeries. No cancer. No heart attack. I feel great. Everything works, mostly.
Why have I been spared while these two wonderful men seemed to have gotten an unlucky roll of the dice? Is the universe just a crap shoot? Or, have I been spared for a reason? Is there something I’m supposed to do with the years I have left?
I walked into the men’s restroom at the senior center this morning where I teach technology classes. There was a row of three urinals with a man standing at the far left and a man at the far right with the center urinal open. They were having a conversation. Now, there’s an unwritten rule about urinal behavior. You don’t talk to the guy next to you, and you don’t look. But, these two guys were having a lively and animated conversation. Well, not much animation since their hands were busy, but they seemed to be enjoying the conversation. I don’t know how long they had been there, but they didn’t show any signs of leaving soon. You probably know this, but old men have a hard time peeing. It’s a prostate thing.
I walked up to the center urinal, did my business while they continued to talk over me, and left. They were still talking and waiting. Both of them looked a lot younger than me. Why me? Why, at 80, have I been spared this common malady of old age?
I make light of it with this story, but it’s a serious question. Why me? Why am I still functioning at 80 while so many people much younger than me are leaving?
My wife, Debbie, gave me an answer to the existential question a few weeks ago when I was pondering it out loud. She said, “Because their work is done. Yours isn’t”
I’ve changed the question from “Why me? to “Why am I here?